Mindless No Touching Allowed

[00:00:10] I solved your problem from last week and then you complain. You see what she does to me, Chad? Do you see this? Now they gotta pay extra for that. Gotta get better cameras first. These don't work so well in the low vision, you know, low light conditions. Why can't you put your microphone on the like other webcam stand thing?

[00:00:40] It's over there. Can you, do you want to get it? No. Well grab it real quick. Go ahead. Well, I don't know that it'll work. That's why I'm... If it doesn't, I ain't... Because I, take off the camera part. I don't need that part. Yeah. Oh yeah, spin it. Yeah, tease it with the finger. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:01:08] There you go. Yeah, make it feel like, oh, oh yeah. She was surprised that it jumped out at her. Oh no, you're supposed to unscrew the camera, not the little trackball. I couldn't see what you were doing. I couldn't see what you were doing. Oh yeah, just like, yeah, get it nice and like firm in there. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah. And then you just give it a little twist. A little bit around the edges there. Yep. Mm-hmm.

[00:01:38] Oh, two hands. Ooh. Oh, don't get it stuck. Okay. Okay. Yep. Yep. Whoa. Popped right off the end of that shaft, did it? That's good. That's good. All right. Now let's, uh, let's have you, no, no, you gotta, you gotta see. You don't have like an attachment for it? Oh, what do you know? It's not the right size, but thanks for trying. I appreciate it.

[00:02:07] Nobody could have thought of that solution. Why didn't you say that before you maybe do all that bullshit? Uh, long story short, Chet, I have this and it does not work as I have clearly tried before, but it's always good to let people try new things that they believe in. I'll never try anything new again. Wow. There goes our bedroom life. We have a bedroom life? Yeah. Yeah. Most would describe it as vanilla, but some, some would venture out and say plain vanilla.

[00:02:36] It's not vanilla. I don't think you understand what vanilla is. Like, I, I'll see like things on Reddit where someone's like, oh, I want to try new things with my spouse in the bedroom. Um, we were both virgins when we got married and now I want him to try this. And he says that it's not, it's not allowed under our religion. And it'll be something like super basic. Like, like she's like, I want you to touch me before we have sex. And they're like, no, no, I can't do that.

[00:03:05] And I'm like, oh, you poor girl. But, uh. This is episode 192. No touching allowed. No touching allowed. That's a great title. You know what? You can have it. You can use it. Okay. Here we are eight weeks from 200. The biggest thing I think for us is mindless and or prattle. Now, what are your thoughts on this? This issue I've just raised. I don't know.

[00:03:34] I feel like prattling and then mindless is, you know, just the better way. Yeah. I got, I was counting. Okay. I was like, what's going on there? I'm just looking. So let's see. So this is 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99. Don't I count so good? I count so good.

[00:04:00] Uh, so 200 comes out December 21st is what it looks like. Yup, yup, yup, yup. That's great timing. Why is it? Christmas. 12, 21. It's a palindrome. You still want to do the drinking thing? It's a palindrome. Huh? The drinking thing? Oh, the questions and drinking. I'm all right with it. Or can you. That's fine.

[00:04:27] I wanted to do jokes, but I was like, I feel like you'd win that. I can get you some dad jokes. I already got you a book of dad jokes. So this blind guy, right? Okay. He goes into a bar. Why did you, why did you roll your head like that? She didn't even, she didn't even want to roll her eyes. She's like, my whole head needs to work for this. She had to roll the whole thing. Okay. All right.

[00:04:57] Now, well, now I feel emasculated. You should. Anyway, blind guy goes into a club, right? He goes up to the bar. He orders a drink. Got his C&I dog. And the bartender's like, here's this. You want any water for the dog or anything? He's like, no, no, we're good. We're good. Okay. The bartender watches the guy get up and he walks over to the middle of the dance floor. And he just starts swinging the dog around on the leash, right?

[00:05:26] The bartender runs over. He's freaking out. He's like, sir, sir, what are you doing? And he goes, oh, I'm just having a look around. Haven't heard that one before. Well, why else would you have a seeing eye dog? What kind of dog would you get? Mid. Mid. That's the kind.

[00:05:58] You're kind of mid, but I'll take you. Yeah. Like, I don't want too much because then you got to put too much effort into it. And you don't want too little because then you just have a cat. So, like a middle one would be good. Middle one. Yeah. What kind of animal would you prefer? Hmm. Oh, you're getting a phone call. That's awkward for you. It's probably Walgreens.

[00:06:27] Somebody from Laredo, Texas. Oh, then I don't know. Have you gotten videos? I think it's just me. But this video of a guy whose, I guess, family owns some property out in East Texas. And he's been spending like two to three years now building a giant log cabin out there out of the trees that were on the property. Hmm. And he's using it all with, like, hand tools and, like, saws and things.

[00:06:56] And apparently in the middle of it, he got selected to go on Naked and Afraid, the show. So, like, he's also, he's, like, in college and he would get away and said he drove, like, six hours to go up to the property to work on the cabin and then, you know, try on this, that, and the other. And then went on Naked and Afraid.

[00:07:21] So, he's got, like, honestly, a lot of, like, these gigantic logs set up and he's starting to fill in cracks and everything. And I'm like, that's a cool project to do. But that's, like, a ton of work for the cabin it is. But it looks really cool. I think it's, like, cedar trees or something like that. Nice. Probably smells great. They're, like, giant, like, 30, 40-foot-long trees, though, that he's got on there. Yeah. I was just looking.

[00:07:51] And then is upset that the cable's hitting her in the face. You just see the cable moving on the camera. But that's amazing. I'm surprised she sat on me. Normally, she doesn't sit on me like this unless I have a blanket. Yeah. They've been much more cuddly in the big house. They're, like, hey, I don't know where you keep wandering off to. We can't see you all the time. They're, like, oh, we were too close before. I didn't want you all up in my space. Yeah.

[00:08:22] But her, she's been sleeping on me a lot, too. She's, like, now we got this big bed. I can tolerate you. Oh, you know what I just realized? I brought my Xbox up here. Yeah. But I can't take it back with me. Because then I'm going on that work trip. So it's going to be sitting in my car for, like, a week. And I don't want it sitting in there in the sun. Dang. Oh, no.

[00:08:51] Xbox games pass. For you. You just don't want her on you. I didn't move. You hit her with the cable, though, dingus. Oh. You let go of it. I didn't even notice. Hit her with it. Look, she's, like, shivering now. She got the shakies in her skin. The shakies in her skin? Yeah. You ever seen the skin shakies on cats? No. What the fuck? It was just happening. Oh, I know what you're talking about. I've never heard it called that before. I don't know.

[00:09:21] I got this camping trip retreat thing coming up. And I'm half excited, half not. Go work in the woods for a little bit. Oh, no. Not my phone dying. Team holding exercises. Not my phone not being able to be reached by concerned parties. Oh, no. Ignoring work calls. Why can't you take, like, a charger thing with you?

[00:09:51] Like a battery. Like a power bank? I'll take some. I don't think we're going to have any generators out there, though. Yeah, but, like, like a backup battery? You think that backup battery is going to be enough for a week? If you use it sparingly. Yeah. I'll only use my phone for, like, the thin ray of hope. All right. That was good. Well, you could send me good morning and good night text messages. Oh, yeah. That's what I use the battery for. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

[00:10:22] Why don't you take a bath tonight? Yeah. I didn't want to hang out with you either, so. You could take one, too. Not at the same time. And your baths take forever. You could take one with me. We do not have anywhere near a big enough bathtub. That bathtub doesn't even fit me in it. You could get a hot tub. That's also not a tonight thing or a solution to this problem. Okay, well. I hope you know you're not as comfortable as the floor. When are you going to sleep?

[00:10:52] Hmm? When are you going to sleep? When I'm tired. When do you go to sleep? I was going to take a bath as soon as we were done recording. What? Midday? Yeah. That's crazy. You have so many snacks to clean up. We talked about this last week. Now, Waterball hasn't moved in a week, chat. It's still there. It's because we're recording on the same day, chat. Don't let him lie to you. No. If it was the same day, why would our clothes and hair be? Why would? My hair looks the same. It's different.

[00:11:21] We are allowed to change shirts. Your hair is all swoopy instead of swishy. I remember. I actually... Oh, sorry. Oh, my. Me and my friend recently FaceTimed, and she was telling me about how she got her hair cut, and she got her bangs cut, and she was telling me she was trying to explain how she wanted them cut, and she's like, you know right now they're all swoopy like this, and normally I like them like this, like swish. And I was like, I know exactly what you mean. They're swooping, not swishing.

[00:11:49] I know exactly what you were talking about. I was laughing so hard. It was a really fun conversation. No, not even a relevant one. Swooping and swishing. Yeah, I'm just saying. I fixed the audio a little bit this week for you, so you should be good there. Do you like it? Do I like what? The audio. Does it sound good?

[00:12:16] I mean, I think it sounds better than when we were over on the couch. Like, there are solutions. We will have to adjust them, but, you know. You're a solution. No. I mean, I consume solutions a lot. Oh, yeah? What's your favorite kind? Whiskey. What's yours? Vodka. Nah. Not even a good one. You didn't ask if it was a good one. You asked what my favorite was.

[00:12:46] That's okay, I guess. We all have our things, okay? What is this? Halloween countdown? The 2026 Halloween countdown. Do you want to watch a scary movie with me? Not a chance. I was trying to scroll to October 1st.

[00:13:16] October 1st, the beyond. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I don't know what that is. I don't know. It's a horror movie masterpiece, apparently. October 2nd is Eyes Without a Face. Eyes Without a Face. A French horror classic that inspired Halloween. Mm-hmm. I was actually, have you ever seen the original Halloween? I don't think so. Because I'd really like to show it to you because the second one is my favorite.

[00:13:46] October 5th is Ice Cream Man. An ice cream. I haven't seen that in a long time. It might just be the greatest B movie horror. What else? It's a great pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Okay, okay. I don't really like Charlie Brown. Why not? Why don't you like Charlie Brown? I don't know. It just always creeped me out. How does it creep you out? I don't like the...

[00:14:16] Sounds kind of... Like design. Design. Scary. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It's scary. It's called Peanuts. Yeah. It's scary. Oh, man. I don't even know what I was looking up anymore. I don't know anything. Anyway. What else do we have? We have so many board games that we haven't played. Then we should play some. Thanks.

[00:14:46] You're real helpful. Just all over the place. We still haven't tried the botany game. Yep. Did we try the Hunger? Is that the... Yeah, we've tried it. Yeah. I'd play it again. It was fun. Duel. We need to play the history game. The medical one, we've only got like a few more playthroughs, right? Yeah. It's like a certain amount of patients. We could work on that tonight if you want. We're shuffling side effects. Mm-hmm.

[00:15:16] Mm-hmm. I don't know. We gotta... I gotta figure out what I wanna do the rest of the afternoon. Pack. I do need to pack after this, I suppose. I'll say it's all true. See, I can take a bath. You can pack. If you want. Plus, my head really hurts. Yeah. It's been a lot of happiness today. It's not used to it. I'm actually like wondering about the weather. Okay. Y'all, she's such a grandma now. It's crazy.

[00:15:45] We were out to lunch, and she just stops mid-bite and goes, I have to stop eating now. I'm like, why? She's like, well, my joints hurt, so I think it's gonna rain. I've got some heartburn because this sauce is a little too spicy for me. Y'all, it was ranch. It was ranch. It was poblano ranch. On the taco.

[00:16:16] And then we had chips and queso, and she said, okay, you're gonna have the queso. I'll just have the queso. Because they put peppers in the queso. You're right, grandma. Shut up. It just leaves more spice for you, okay? I won't take you to the ethnic people's place of food anymore. I feel like Japan and I would get along, you know? Japan's got a lot of spice.

[00:16:45] I feel like you're thinking about Korea. Why? Because Japanese food is really mild, I feel like. Or salty. Don't they have the green paste of death? Gojuchang? Is that green? It's not green. Well, then it's not what I'm talking about. Oh. Wasabi? Yeah, bless you. It's not the green paste of death, and you're only supposed to put a tiny bit on stuff. But it's also not that hot.

[00:17:18] Wasabi doesn't bother me that much. That's crazy, because you had a bell pepper for lunch today, and you're like, me heart. It's kind of like the same thing as, you know, poison ivy. I'm not allergic to it, but get me around some grass, and it's over for me. We have so much grass now. The grass here isn't that bad, actually. It makes me a little itchy, but it doesn't give me the cuts like the other grass does. It's a much softer grass than traditional. And fluffy. Springy and bushy.

[00:17:46] Yeah, it's like a small bush instead of a small blade of grass. Like, you're not going to find a big blade of grass out there. So I can, like, stand on it, and it's not a problem. Be weird if it was a problem. You're a problem. All right. What else was on your notes? I saw you taking a bunch of notes earlier. I think that was it. You talked about them all? Boy, your notes suck. Sorry. I was like, I got my nose.

[00:18:18] Yeah, I wonder why. All you're doing is just rubbing down the cats and then grabbing your face. Yeah, I didn't know that ADT, the security company, does gutters and water softeners as well. Yeah. I found that out yesterday. They knocked on the door, and I was very surprised. And I was like, yeah, I'm kind of interested in getting gutters, so maybe. They're like, well, we can give you a quick walk around and an estimate and this, that, and the other. I'm like, all right.

[00:18:48] And they were nice about it, too, right? You said they weren't super, like, pushy. No, they weren't pushy about it at all. They were like, hey, here's what it would be. Here's your estimate. I'll text it to you. And they just sent it over, and that was it. I'm like, cool. But it was good. Oh, excuse me. There is no excuse for you. I'm getting tired, man. I'm going to have to cut this one short so I can go. Take another nap. Figure out what I'm going to do. No, I got to go be productive.

[00:19:16] I've been putting off too much stuff for too long. Like what? I got to pack. I got to prep stuff here. Got to make sure all this stuff's ready in the garage. It's going to be great. Well, get to it, punk. Get to it. What are you doing? Looking through random websites.

[00:19:44] Yeah, looking through random websites. Like I said, my head hurts and I'm tired. Well, you got to do an outro if you're going to leave. Well, it's only been 20 minutes. Thank goodness you can still read. Okie dokie. My name is Ripley. That is Jordon. He's mindless. And I'm Prattle. And we're your favorite hosts. We hope you like what you heard. And if you did, we hope you'll like and subscribe. You can get new episodes from us every Monday wherever you get your podcasts at noon.

[00:20:12] And every Tuesday on YouTube we put out new videos. That should be it for this time. We'll catch you next time. And we hope you have a great day. Goodbye.