Mindless Ex-Girlfriends

[00:00:01] It's not good. What's wrong with it? I don't like that. I haven't tried it yet. It tastes like fake sugar or something

[00:00:18] I don't like that. Did you buy like all organic or like?

[00:00:22] I don't like it. Yeah, fake sugar. No, it's just not right, but it's not very lemonade-y

[00:00:32] It's more on the watery side. Yeah, it's I don't like it. I guess it's fine. It doesn't fix the craving for soda

[00:00:40] Yeah, why would it?

[00:00:44] That'd be crazy well

[00:00:48] Hello Jordan

[00:00:50] Hello

[00:00:52] Welcome back to our podcast. Yeah after you took a week off, huh? It's been like two

[00:00:58] Yeah, that's how weeks off work

[00:01:02] You put out an episode and then don't put out one and then put out another one. That's two weeks

[00:01:08] Well here we are welcome back to mindless prattle. I'm Ripley. That's Jordan and we're back

[00:01:15] Do you want to go first or should I go first? I feel like you have more stories. I had a very awesome experience today

[00:01:23] Yeah

[00:01:26] Where I was closing and literally like five minutes to close this guy walks in and I see a leash and I assume he's got like a dog, right?

[00:01:35] No, like a fucking cat jumps up on a chair and sits down and I'm like he's got a cat on a leash

[00:01:42] And he's walking him

[00:01:43] And so he orders and I make his drink or whatever and

[00:01:47] He's about to leave and I'm like hey, do you mind if I take a picture of your cat?

[00:01:49] And he's like

[00:01:50] No, but you have to follow his YouTube and I'm like your cat has a YouTube

[00:01:56] He whips out his phone and the wallpaper on the front of his phone is the QR code that links to his cats YouTube

[00:02:04] Yeah, that's that sounds about right. Mm-hmm cat was super cute got to pet him

[00:02:08] He's very chill dude. He was kind of a hefty boy

[00:02:11] Not like in a fat way, but like in a muscular way. Yeah

[00:02:15] So

[00:02:17] So then they leave or whatever and he's got him on a harness and stuff

[00:02:20] And we look out the window because the doors are now locked and the cats just like climbing up a tree with the guy

[00:02:26] The guy was climbing up the tree

[00:02:28] He was like helping the cat climb up and then just like watching him go up into the tree

[00:02:32] And I was like, you know what you go cat dude

[00:02:37] And then I checked out the YouTube and he's got like only four hundred something subscribers

[00:02:42] Now I was like dang. I feel like this cat needs more subscribers

[00:02:47] Was it just an Austin cat or like what is it? Yeah, his name is inky the black cat

[00:02:52] Inky the black cat how creative

[00:02:56] Sweet though. Mm-hmm, but yeah, I guess he just walks around awesome with his cat

[00:03:01] Yeah, I browsed through slightly but like there was nothing super exciting about it other than that was a cat

[00:03:08] So I was like alright this makes sense

[00:03:11] That's Austin for you

[00:03:14] But you know, I've always heard keep Austin weird

[00:03:17] But like I haven't actually seen that many things that we consider super weird like we're from Vegas, you know

[00:03:22] Yeah, I don't think having a cat is

[00:03:24] Super weird. I think if he walked in and was like, yeah, this is my pet duck on the leash then you

[00:03:31] Bring their cat into the store. Well, I feel like

[00:03:36] Walking cats is not that rare of an occurrence to call it a weird thing

[00:03:40] But I've never seen a cat

[00:03:43] Yes, you have you specifically used to go to coffee shops that had cats

[00:03:49] Mm-hmm the like cat themed cafe things

[00:03:52] I would love to go to one but I've only been to video game

[00:03:55] You have told me you've gone to cat ones. So you've been lying to me. I feel like you've been lying now

[00:04:03] I don't know. I might have just forgotten

[00:04:05] See

[00:04:06] Not that weird then is it?

[00:04:11] Would love to open a cat cafe. No

[00:04:14] Why not? You don't need more things to be attached to

[00:04:18] But you usually open them to help them get adopted to other people. Oh, yeah

[00:04:23] You're one to let things go. I remember I

[00:04:26] Could if I could give them homes

[00:04:29] You would want to be the one to home them. Yes, or I would love to like when I'm older

[00:04:35] Have like a cat rescue

[00:04:38] You know like we're like unwanted cats can like just live out their days

[00:04:42] I want to run a shelter like a huge farm shelter. Oh, wow. Yeah, that sounds

[00:04:49] Terrible why would it be terrible?

[00:04:51] To never have free time and to be only looking after 80 cats if that's what you want

[00:04:57] You give them all

[00:05:02] Why would you give them all air tags?

[00:05:07] So like free range though and they'll put like a camera on them

[00:05:10] And they'll give them it like an air tag and then their cat just goes where it wants and it comes home at night time

[00:05:16] That's not having a cat

[00:05:20] But it's usually just like

[00:05:23] For the videos I think I think so too. You like to exploit animals, huh? That's what you want

[00:05:28] I don't think it's animal exploitation because their cats are well loved and taken care of

[00:05:33] And you get wet out of it

[00:05:36] I like to watch cute cats do things

[00:05:39] New cat is doing something she wants to know what the soft thing is in the bag

[00:05:45] She's trapped herself under the desk and she'll know how to get out

[00:05:50] She's just sitting there the new cat is uh struggling under the desk right now. Sorry y'all she's sitting in the trash currently

[00:05:58] I forget that you have a trash can there who's you it's your and mine with we

[00:06:02] Barely used it. That's why you never take it out. I see I yeah, it's full every time I come in here

[00:06:08] Like that's interesting

[00:06:11] Well, you got stories or you want me to go over it?

[00:06:14] I got more

[00:06:15] Have you heard of the Kendrick Lamar and drake beef that's going on? No, it's kind of funny. So Kendrick Lamar

[00:06:23] It's a rapper dropped like a diss track about drake with some pretty serious accusations

[00:06:28] Yeah, and then a little like about a day drake's team responded and like dropped a diss track about Kendrick Lamar

[00:06:36] So Kendrick Lamar dropped another one

[00:06:40] With even more crazy accusations and they're both like referencing taylor swift in their lyrics because Kendrick Lamar has done work with taylor swift

[00:06:47] Um, I don't and so has drake

[00:06:50] So it's very interesting. Um, and I just think it's funny like I don't know if interesting is to be the word like it sounds like

[00:06:57] Two millionaires are bored and just want to tell each other through solvers to get to know why it started because I don't really listen to a ton of rap but

[00:07:06] like

[00:07:06] Kendrick Lamar accused drake of being like a pedophile

[00:07:09] Of having like an 11 year old daughter that he hides from the world because he doesn't want to like take care of her or something

[00:07:15] Um, and just like a bunch of crazy stuff like that and only kendrick lamar knew about it. Whoa

[00:07:21] But what a coincidence, you know

[00:07:24] The rapper world's going crazy right now, especially with like

[00:07:28] You know the other guy just got like arrested or whatever. So the other guy got arrested or whatever

[00:07:33] It's so p diddy. Uh-huh. Yeah

[00:07:37] P diddy did get arrested. Yes, and then keisha was at

[00:07:42] That big concert

[00:07:44] In california. What's that called the big festival coachella coachella?

[00:07:47] She performed at coachella and she sang her song

[00:07:50] Where she used to say wake up in the morning feeling like p diddy and she changed the lyrics in them to wake up in the morning and say

[00:07:56] Fuck p diddy

[00:07:59] It was kind of funny

[00:08:00] crazy

[00:08:05] I just kind of put like random things

[00:08:09] Yeah

[00:08:12] But like so jordan and I went to vr yesterday

[00:08:16] like

[00:08:17] Virtual reality to vr. Yes. We just looked at it and like, ah, is that what it is?

[00:08:21] Can you explain what it is so I because I can't I don't have the words

[00:08:24] It's a company that has big rooms with sensors and you stand in these big rooms and you play their vr games

[00:08:31] That's it. That's the whole concept

[00:08:33] It was so fun. All right

[00:08:36] I don't feel like it was super long, but

[00:08:40] Like it's because we were just in one space

[00:08:42] no, I feel like if

[00:08:44] They're trying to minimize the amount of people who get like motion sick in it too because like you said

[00:08:48] There wasn't a lot of there wasn't a lot of moving around the scene that you were in was pretty static

[00:08:54] Uh, like you didn't have to move or run or anything

[00:08:58] But I liked the the monitors on like the feet and everything. I don't know that the vest like

[00:09:04] Helped so much as as like, uh

[00:09:07] A guide just to like which way your body was facing but I think that was about it

[00:09:12] um, well

[00:09:14] You know we have a vr headset and

[00:09:16] Um, they do sell like the sensors for the arms and legs for it

[00:09:21] Yeah, I just don't know how accurate it'd be. You know, it's pretty accurate

[00:09:26] Hmm. I don't know until I can just put lay down and plug my brain and then play video games with my brain

[00:09:32] I know I want that the like of the Japanese like the enemies

[00:09:38] Except for sword art in line. I don't want that why

[00:09:42] Would be the issue. I don't want to die in the video game and die in real life

[00:09:48] Well, yeah, because this life's going so great

[00:09:51] I just

[00:09:52] I'm not

[00:09:53] I don't think I'd be very good at fighting you think that you and like

[00:09:58] A hundred other people get trapped in skyrim

[00:10:00] You're like if you die here you're dying real life and you wouldn't be like

[00:10:03] Well, fuck guess I live out skyrim life

[00:10:05] And you know what it was a lot of people in fucking s. A. O. We're just like well

[00:10:09] I'll become a merchant. I'm not good at fighting

[00:10:11] Like they focused on the fighting but like there was blacksmiths and like merchants like

[00:10:17] There are a ton of people who didn't know fighting

[00:10:20] I would definitely like if I was in skyrim, I would have some issues, right?

[00:10:26] I would definitely join like the

[00:10:31] Really calm, I don't know them purials sure

[00:10:36] Yeah, I joined them because you're guaranteed housing meals all that sort of stuff

[00:10:41] And they're not racist

[00:10:43] So that's pretty cool

[00:10:45] um

[00:10:46] I would probably highly focus on like my speech skills

[00:10:52] I'm not good at archery in real life. So I don't think I could actually do archery in a video game

[00:10:57] Can I still get trained like like do all the video game mechanics still apply or does it become like

[00:11:04] Regular reality because I think all the video game mechanics should apply like they do in the shows

[00:11:09] This show. Yeah, I mean that's that's video game logic. Yeah

[00:11:14] We're talking about living in a video game not living in skyrim world

[00:11:18] I think I would probably have to max out magica and speech

[00:11:24] Really?

[00:11:28] And sneak

[00:11:31] Gonna be a sneaky archer

[00:11:34] I'll probably swindle some men for some money. Yeah, I'm just gonna pick pocket everybody. Oh, I could become a vampire

[00:11:43] We're playing base game you'll have DLC

[00:11:47] I'd get a horse I'd get a horse. Well, I can't have a house in the base game

[00:11:53] Uh, yes, you can you just can't build one. You mean oh, yeah, I guess I could buy a house in any city

[00:11:59] If you could live in any skyrim city, which one would you pick?

[00:12:02] Um

[00:12:07] I don't know. Uh, honestly, maybe

[00:12:11] If we're going the whole sneaky thing like maybe riftin would be fun

[00:12:15] There's probably get stabbed in riftin

[00:12:17] Yeah, there's problems with every city like white run seems like the most climatized

[00:12:21] But it's also the least defended like it's in the middle of a fucking field

[00:12:25] You could just be attacked from anywhere, right?

[00:12:28] Solitude pretty easily defendable, right?

[00:12:31] But like you're up on a cliff side and you're with a bunch of fucking

[00:12:36] Special people that live there. Yeah, and plus like the political climate there. Oof

[00:12:42] You got a winter like people are literally poisoning each other

[00:12:45] Yeah, you go to winter hold and like sure you either live in poverty or you're a mage at the school

[00:12:50] There's no in between

[00:12:52] Like

[00:12:54] You know what?

[00:12:56] I would go to the um

[00:12:59] College of the like the bars and stuff whatever is it? What is it? Sure the bars college. Okay

[00:13:06] I have a great singing voice. I could make money singing

[00:13:10] I'm sure you're good and if we're going by canon game, we're still the dragonborn, right?

[00:13:15] I don't think you could put like 200 dragonborns in there

[00:13:19] Like when I get trapped in a single player game

[00:13:22] I

[00:13:25] Would be the dragonborn

[00:13:29] That doesn't what does that mean exactly

[00:13:32] You know how many vikings had tattoos of dragons and shit and make them part of the dragon clan or I could join the companions

[00:13:39] I don't think I want to be a werewolf though. Like I'm not in well. It's kind of their whole thing. So

[00:13:43] Might be kind of difficult

[00:13:48] I it just isn't for me of like the base game

[00:13:52] Races the werewolves are pretty strong. So I'm saying they are very strong. I just

[00:13:58] Don't want to look like that

[00:14:00] We didn't look like that during the day. They looked like normal people

[00:14:03] I don't want to turn into the wolf like a werewolf. Maybe you turn into like a wolf creature

[00:14:07] Yeah, but they had control over it. It wasn't like they just randomly turned into it

[00:14:11] No, I think I'd want to be like a barred mage like

[00:14:15] I learned spells like uh

[00:14:18] Is she playing the flute? No, she's spitting fire

[00:14:21] run away

[00:14:23] the

[00:14:24] elemental things to

[00:14:27] Fight for you

[00:14:30] I also feel like none of the enemies in like base game skyrim were super difficult besides like some dragons, you know

[00:14:39] I don't remember any fights that were like super difficult or like didn't take like a couple tries. Yeah, like

[00:14:46] Even the dragons didn't really get difficult until you got up into the higher levels and you started facing the like

[00:14:51] Frost dragons versus fire dragons and all that stuff. Yeah, what's the city that's on the far west side?

[00:14:57] mark our

[00:14:59] All right

[00:15:01] Okay, the one with like it's all the stairs and it's got like the giant like old dwarven like um

[00:15:08] Uh castle

[00:15:10] I think it was falcreith, wouldn't it?

[00:15:13] Falcreith is at the bottom left. It's the foresty one

[00:15:16] Falcreith is bottom. Oh, that one's just like the normal village in the mountains. No, I'm right mark arth also known as the city of stone

[00:15:24] Yeah, I would hate that one. There's so many fucking stairs. Okay, but I really like it looks good

[00:15:29] But so many stairs. I really really like the house there

[00:15:33] The house there is the best house. It's the biggest house. It has like a whole den area

[00:15:37] There's like a whole room that you can set up like equipment and stuff in

[00:15:41] But again, it's so many stairs the primary extremely high

[00:15:45] People getting stabbed in the streets cults. You talking about you stabbing people

[00:15:49] No

[00:15:50] You literally walk in and you can save the person but you literally walk into mark arth for the first time and you watch a guy get

[00:15:56] Stabbed or no, you watch a woman get stabbed, but you can prevent it from happening if you know it's gonna happen

[00:16:03] Yeah, we're gonna say you don't know the future of these uh

[00:16:05] The people is the if you've played we're not playing it the normal way

[00:16:11] No, we're not playing the story, babe. We're playing VR online

[00:16:16] It's mmo rules now anything happens

[00:16:21] Or I might work at the meetery

[00:16:23] We're in the meetery

[00:16:27] What's the what's the storm cloaks like capital city place

[00:16:32] Um

[00:16:34] Wendelm, right?

[00:16:35] Is it windhelm like the snow cover place that place would suck always cold

[00:16:41] again

[00:16:43] Every every street except like the main thing you see when you walk into that town is the fucking tavern

[00:16:48] And then behind it's the gas a loot. You can't even see also known as the city of kings. Yeah, sure

[00:16:54] I'm the one king

[00:16:57] I don't know if yet which city are you gonna pick then?

[00:17:00] Um, I really like falcreath and I'm delusional enough to think that I could survive in a tiny town

[00:17:06] Isolated in the middle of falcreath has no different. It has like a wooden wall at least white run

[00:17:11] You have like the stone walls a little bit

[00:17:14] But like I said, I plan on having magic

[00:17:17] You plan on having magic and I imagine I'd have to get efficient with a dagger as well

[00:17:21] Look, you're dropping into a world that's in the middle of a war and like in video games. Yeah

[00:17:27] the ones we got now

[00:17:29] When you go into like a fight between the sides, it's like 15 people versus 15 people

[00:17:35] But like you go into video game world where they got all the the technologies to put you in the game

[00:17:40] I feel like you'll drop into a fight of like hundreds and hundreds of people, you know

[00:17:44] Those hunt 200 soldiers from fucking wherever the storm cloaks are coming to attack the little town

[00:17:49] Your wood wall is not gonna do much

[00:17:51] I don't remember them attacking falcreaths. You know what I mean though

[00:17:54] Like you guys being there and like all the players you

[00:17:58] Besides if there's another player with magic who sides with like the storm cloaks

[00:18:02] And he's like, you know what let me commit to all the storm cloaks to go attack fucking falcreath

[00:18:07] No defenses

[00:18:11] You don't get to choose that why you act like this is your world with the rate of dragonborn

[00:18:16] What do you mean?

[00:18:18] Like say like the 200 people get trapped in this world. How many would be a dragonborn?

[00:18:23] Maybe one

[00:18:24] Maybe yeah, that's the whole point of skyrim those one person has to be the dragonborn

[00:18:31] They don't have to be

[00:18:33] You could have easily not been dragonborn and killed those people you wouldn't have been able to kill alduin

[00:18:37] You don't have to shout at him to kill him

[00:18:41] You need shouts to summon the dragon that takes you to where alduin is

[00:18:45] Or you can just talk to the fucking dragons at the top

[00:18:49] I'm like I need you to take me places

[00:18:51] But how can you talk to them without being dragonborn?

[00:18:53] What do you mean because the blades are the one who tell you like how to get

[00:18:59] To where you get the scroll and then you need to scroll in order to see the pass

[00:19:03] You know only the dragonborn can see it without going blind

[00:19:09] How are you gonna be blind and fight alduin why do I need to fight him?

[00:19:14] Because he has to die. Why he's gonna swallow the world

[00:19:18] Isn't he doing that by gaining like power from other dragons? Yeah, so just kill the other dragons

[00:19:26] But he can just keep resurrecting them canny and you can keep killing them remember you have magic

[00:19:30] I feel like a long-term solution would be better. Oh, yeah a long-term. That's the look you clear the video game

[00:19:37] You go home. You don't live there

[00:19:43] It was the whole point of sao is you beat the video game and then you all leave

[00:19:51] Is it the same as in the game like where there's no real urgency to complete the quest or

[00:19:56] What do you mean? There's no real urgency

[00:19:58] And they say oh, it was real time

[00:20:02] Remember they took like two and a half years to clear the game

[00:20:05] And then he woke up in the hospital after like two and a half years all like super skinny because he's on

[00:20:10] IVs for two years

[00:20:14] There's other games that in the like that genre that have been like, oh, yeah, you play

[00:20:20] For two days in the world and it's like six hours in real life

[00:20:23] So there's always a clock on the on your like hud so you can see what time it is in the real world

[00:20:28] Like there are is that but if you're getting trapped in a world, I mean

[00:20:33] I've moved to rift and I think

[00:20:35] To rift in why because I really like the house there

[00:20:41] I don't know that I can remember that house. It's like the honey something house

[00:20:45] But it's the house like right as you enter the gates of rift in on your right

[00:20:50] And it's got a little staircase behind it that leads to a dock on the lake

[00:20:55] And you can have like beehives and stuff and oh maybe it's got a basement. That's really cool

[00:21:02] Um, and you can upgrade it to a kids room or you

[00:21:06] Or you can make it into like an alchemy chamber all these different things lots of storage

[00:21:10] And like people don't really seem to fuck with rift in other than the dragonborn

[00:21:14] Yeah, I don't know why no one goes there. That's the one where you show up and they try to extort you

[00:21:20] And you're just like now i'm gonna leave. Fuck you. I'm the dragonborn

[00:21:26] Oh

[00:21:27] I think like you would have to be

[00:21:30] Uh like the top ranking player in some metric or killed the most dragons or whatever and then they'd be like cool

[00:21:37] You're a dragonborn now now you have the chance to go save whatever and save the world

[00:21:42] I don't think you're just gonna get dropped into the world by like any mini mining you you're a dragonborn

[00:21:47] I'm gonna get built

[00:21:49] Okay

[00:21:50] Why are you why are you all of a sudden have to be the dragonborn to save the world?

[00:21:55] You started out this by saying that you don't think you're

[00:21:58] Well suited for the combat lifestyle of this game

[00:22:01] But you want to be the dragonborn who sole purpose is to save the world through combat

[00:22:05] Like with

[00:22:08] With

[00:22:09] Nothing you can't see

[00:22:12] Are good at using great swords. Uh-huh. I'm gonna get ripped. Yeah. Mm-hmm. You know

[00:22:19] Oh, yeah

[00:22:20] I like ride horses and do push-ups and shit. All right horses and new push-ups. Well, I mean you're halfway there

[00:22:32] In the game you can

[00:22:34] Like getting to level 10 is so easy and you can kill a dragon really easy like if it's the same difficulty then

[00:22:42] I'm sure I can do that

[00:22:44] Oh, now all of a sudden she's got confidence

[00:22:46] And I could kill a dragon. It's fine

[00:22:49] Earlier it was like you want what do you want to do and you're like

[00:22:51] I want to be a bard with some magic and then I'll make a living and I could work in the little

[00:22:55] The metery

[00:22:57] And you're like you don't get to be the dragonborn be like I'll fuck a bitch up. I don't

[00:23:00] What are you talking about? I'll kill motherfucker. I'll be dragonborn

[00:23:05] You can't meet her for the axe unless you're the dragonborn

[00:23:08] Oh, no, what will you do without the friendly old man that made you climb 10,000 steps to talk to him?

[00:23:14] Listen, I'll live in mark heart. I'll get those steps in. I'll get those steps in

[00:23:19] I'm gonna kill me some dragons. Yeah, I'll take balance

[00:23:23] Oh man, you know it'd be great from video games as if you uh

[00:23:29] Could take like the fault damage of video game logic

[00:23:31] Oh

[00:23:33] In real life that'd be great and by what's that? I'm like, I don't know just bunch of people jump out of fucking buildings and shit

[00:23:38] Because the elevator slower

[00:23:40] Look at this guy bouncing down the fucking mountain. Yeah, like what's that?

[00:23:43] I don't know elevators only go up in this world to get down just jump it's way faster than the loading screen

[00:23:50] Like if you carefully scale the scale of the building it doesn't count

[00:23:56] as like in

[00:23:58] In starfield and like their main city

[00:24:00] That you the first city you go to if you go up to that very top

[00:24:05] The if you jump off the building and then just jetpack before the ground

[00:24:10] Takes like 10 seconds if you go back through the building to go through the loading screens of the different rooms

[00:24:15] And the elevator down to the bottom. It's like a good two minutes. Oh, you may as well just jump off

[00:24:21] Like it's so much faster

[00:24:26] Also, did you see that hell divers was pulled from sale in a lot of countries?

[00:24:32] No, it's because of like political bullshit

[00:24:35] But I made sure apparently the devs are just like not responding to anybody. They've just gone like silent

[00:24:41] They're not like explaining their plan or anything like that and people are like piss because they've spent money on this game

[00:24:47] Or something. I don't nothing about hell divers. You played it. Yeah, I mean, I've only played for like three hours

[00:24:53] It's not very long but

[00:24:56] I don't know people were upset about like a uh a cape that people got like a few weeks ago and

[00:25:03] Yeah, I don't know exactly where like the game is gonna go

[00:25:06] Like you can introduce new weapons and stuff

[00:25:08] But like the mechanics of it aren't really going to change too much

[00:25:12] And especially if you don't change like the maps like most of the maps kind of look pretty similar either way

[00:25:18] but

[00:25:18] I don't

[00:25:20] But yeah, I was like, I don't know but

[00:25:23] People are having a fit over this. They're like we want answers. Yeah, I haven't seen much about it to know

[00:25:32] So you want to talk about how you accidentally subscribe to all those pet emails

[00:25:37] Huh, you want to talk about how you accidentally subscribe to all those pet emails? I already fixed that

[00:25:43] Yeah, but I thought we could talk about it. So earlier today

[00:25:47] I'm really was

[00:25:49] applying for some pet thingies and

[00:25:55] Uh, so she had all the answers. So I was typing the answers in

[00:25:59] And I get to the page and I'm like, what's this? She's like just fill it out

[00:26:03] I was like, all right, and then I go oh, I have to answer all these questions

[00:26:06] She's like, yeah, just answer other questions like cool

[00:26:08] So I'm clicking on all the things and it's been like 15 minutes at this point

[00:26:11] It's so many questions because she's not super like, you know helpful with the answer part

[00:26:16] And so then I get to the very end and it's like

[00:26:19] It's like you've completed this hit submit. So I scroll down

[00:26:24] To hit submit and like as I'm clicking submit, she goes, oh, no, you wanted to unclick all those things

[00:26:29] I'm like all what things and you know, and she's like, oh, you just subscribed to like five different little like pet email services

[00:26:34] And I'm like, why don't you speak up sooner? Because he was scrolling so fast

[00:26:38] I thought you were gonna slow down and actually read what was happening on the page

[00:26:41] No, why would I do that? Click forget click forget. I guess it

[00:26:46] Anyway, so then like 10 minutes 15 minutes later

[00:26:49] I had just opened my email and I had six emails from different like pet companies

[00:26:54] So I just went through an unsubscribe to them all real quick. I'm like, all right. Well, that was annoying

[00:26:57] But whatever it was so funny

[00:27:00] It made me laugh a bit

[00:27:04] Yeah

[00:27:05] That's interesting you got there

[00:27:08] I went uh

[00:27:10] I went to get an oil change the other day

[00:27:13] And I guess this oil change place

[00:27:16] specializes in ambulances

[00:27:18] I don't know why but I pulled in to one side and I was confused because it said entrance only

[00:27:25] And I drove over that little like bell

[00:27:28] Like sensor line thing that notifies the mechanics when the cars pulled up, you know

[00:27:33] So I drove over that and I heard it ding

[00:27:36] And then I'm looking at it and there's two bays for this oil change place

[00:27:41] And then the one on the right, there's a truck facing away from me and the one on the left

[00:27:45] There's an ambulance facing towards me

[00:27:48] And I was like, I swear that thing said entrance only

[00:27:51] I did someone back in like they turned around the ambulance and backed in I was like, I don't I don't know

[00:27:56] So then the guy comes out and he's like, what are you here for?

[00:27:59] And I was like, you just an oil change. He goes, all right, pull behind the truck. I'm like

[00:28:02] I kind of figured yeah, I wouldn't give him a go like nose to nose with an ambulance. But all right

[00:28:07] So I pulled by and he's like, yeah, we're almost done. My god

[00:28:10] And so I was like waiting there for him to come back out

[00:28:13] So I'd go inside and wait because they had a waiting room like a normal place and he goes, all right

[00:28:18] Pull forward and he like starts waving me in. I was like, okay

[00:28:21] So I pull in I'm in the bay now and he goes, all right, just turn it off put the keys on the dash

[00:28:25] and I was like, okay

[00:28:27] So I put the keys on the dash he goes, all right, well

[00:28:29] Well, we'll be done in just a few minutes and I was like, okay, am I staying in here?

[00:28:33] He goes, oh, yeah, you don't need to get out and I was like, oh, all right. That's cool. I guess

[00:28:37] So now I'm sitting like in my car in the bay and I was like, yeah

[00:28:41] I've been to like valvally and does that a lot too

[00:28:43] That you just stay inside because they're pretty quick

[00:28:45] Yeah, last time I went to get mine

[00:28:47] They had me stay in the car and I was really confused

[00:28:49] Yeah

[00:28:50] Well, so I was sitting there and I look over and the ambulance is next to me

[00:28:54] And then I look out into their like parking lot behind it and there's like six more ambulances

[00:28:59] And I was like, this is a crazy amount of ambulances for like an oil change place

[00:29:03] And so I was like, okay. That's weird

[00:29:06] Well, so then the guy comes over

[00:29:09] And he starts talking about something he opens the hood of the ambulance and he comes over to the guy

[00:29:15] that's like filling out paperwork for my oil change

[00:29:18] And he tells him he goes, hey, when you guys installed the sirens the wiring's off underneath

[00:29:24] We got to redo the the sirens on behind the bumper

[00:29:28] And the second guy who was helping me he's like, all right. Yeah, just jack it up and start taking it out

[00:29:33] And we'll get it done. He goes, all right walks back over

[00:29:36] It's on one of the like the full vehicle lifts

[00:29:39] So the whole ambulance lifts up into the air, right

[00:29:42] The guy walks underneath it because now it's about eye level with him

[00:29:46] So I'm just bored sitting there watching and I'm like, I don't know. Look at the ambulance

[00:29:50] And I look at the ambulance and this guy

[00:29:53] Is walking along the bottom side of the ambulance with some little snippers and he's cutting off a bunch of zip ties

[00:30:02] And I was like, what is being zip tied to this car right now? So he's cutting off all these zip ties

[00:30:08] Underneath which was holding all these wiring in place up against the

[00:30:14] Body of the ambulance he pulls it out and then reconnects like something to the bumper

[00:30:19] He hits a button and the siren just goes off real quick. It's like whoop

[00:30:22] And then he turns it off and he goes, yep works now

[00:30:25] Puts it back on I'm still sitting there. He does it pretty quick. I don't know why he was complaining about it

[00:30:30] He did it all pretty quick

[00:30:32] And they walked off somewhere came back and just started to re zip tie and it bow back together

[00:30:36] And I was like, is that how ambulances are put together?

[00:30:38] I don't know. I just thought it was so funny. This dude had a zip tie ambulance. I'm like, all right, man

[00:30:42] That is kind of funny

[00:30:46] I'm like, you know what this makes sense. You have like six zip ties here. That's uh six ambulances here

[00:30:52] I don't know why but

[00:30:57] And that was how my old teams went and then I drove away

[00:31:01] And now it's what?

[00:31:02] Then I drove away and then you drove away. I thought you said and now it's your boy and I was like my boy

[00:31:07] Are you all right? I'm fine. Yeah

[00:31:10] My tinnitus is just really bad right now. I wouldn't even close to what I've said

[00:31:15] I have not been able to hear anybody all week

[00:31:17] Oh, man

[00:31:19] At work especially I get I feel like I'm annoying customers because I have to ask them to repeat themselves

[00:31:24] And then I'm just like, I'm sorry. My brain doesn't work right

[00:31:27] I feel like I don't know how bartenders ever hear my order

[00:31:31] Right same

[00:31:32] It's always just so loud and bars and stuff and then they're like, what do you want?

[00:31:35] I'm like, I can barely hear them. No, sometimes they'll just nod at me because I can't hear them

[00:31:39] And I'm like, uh jack and coke and they're like, uh-huh

[00:31:43] Anyway, and then I walk off like I don't think you heard me

[00:31:46] Sometimes you can't trust them like sometimes they get right

[00:31:48] And then sometimes I'll order something and then I start drinking whatever they give me and I'm like, this is not that

[00:31:55] Yeah, if you're ordering something complicated, they'll usually just shortcut it and just put in whatever they think you said

[00:32:01] They're like six ingredients this move I order a beer

[00:32:05] Like I'm sort of like basic cocktails sometimes, you know, and then I'll get a different one on the mic

[00:32:09] Are they new bartender or do they just not have the ingredients or do they just hate me? You know

[00:32:20] It's pretty cool. We're gonna be married soon. That is true. We get married in one week

[00:32:24] So which we will

[00:32:28] Put an episode or we won't uh

[00:32:31] depends on when we find time or if we find time really

[00:32:35] But we've been super cramped and busy with the schedule the last few weeks

[00:32:39] Uh, that's why there was no episode last week. They might not be an episode this next week

[00:32:45] Um, uh, yeah, no, it's it's gonna be pretty busy

[00:32:52] But we'll see what we can do maybe we'll squeeze an episode in somewhere or some shorts or something. Yeah

[00:33:01] Oh

[00:33:03] Well, what else you got my book's almost done. You said it would be done

[00:33:10] It's a process. Okay

[00:33:13] She said I'm a liar. That's what she said to be done so bad. There's so much I need to write

[00:33:19] She hasn't been writing that's what she said

[00:33:23] She hasn't been writing as much that's what she's saying writing as much but I have been writing

[00:33:28] This has been Ripley translator. Thank you for

[00:33:31] We could make a great video about that

[00:33:36] He's very good at it. Yeah, what are these for?

[00:33:40] What are you doing?

[00:33:42] Sorry, I just I wanted to ask earlier what I did

[00:33:45] It was like usb sticks and not my dad

[00:33:49] She just randomly points to what goes what do these things do?

[00:33:53] Oh, I see the converter thingy

[00:33:56] Yeah

[00:33:57] What?

[00:33:59] Yeah, they convert things

[00:34:02] I mean why are you laughing?

[00:34:05] It's just very random

[00:34:08] What am I saved as in your phone?

[00:34:10] Baby cakes

[00:34:13] Why?

[00:34:13] Because I love that name. Why?

[00:34:16] It's cute. It's so cute. It's so cute

[00:34:21] How'd you come up with that name? I don't know. I just started thinking it one day. Uh-huh. What does it mean?

[00:34:27] You're my baby and you got cake and I got cake

[00:34:30] You got cake. What does that mean?

[00:34:32] You got booty

[00:34:36] And we're gonna be eating wedding cake together soon

[00:34:39] And you got cake

[00:34:43] Are you crying? I feel like mine is more accurate than yours

[00:34:50] What what's your name for me Jordan?

[00:34:54] You know what it is go on you need to explain it. I don't need to explain it. It's accurate. You know it

[00:34:59] No, I don't go ahead. No. What is it? No, you peeped at my phone

[00:35:03] I didn't peep at your phone your notifications went off and I saw my name

[00:35:07] No, it did not because you did not text me while you were standing next to my phone

[00:35:11] You just peeped over at my phone. What does it say?

[00:35:15] Number one ex-girlfriend

[00:35:18] With stars there's stars there

[00:35:21] It's star number one ex-girlfriend star

[00:35:24] That makes it better. Yeah

[00:35:27] You're a star

[00:35:30] You're something I don't know what

[00:35:36] Did I talk about like almost breaking my toe last time? Yeah, yeah, I think so

[00:35:43] I'm just so tired all the time. I'm working nine days in a row, which I know you work so much more than that

[00:35:50] Nah, that's all good

[00:35:51] we uh

[00:35:56] Oh, we were talking about it at work and uh

[00:35:59] I think you you'd text me while I was showing somebody like another work text or something

[00:36:04] He goes, why are you texting your ex-girlfriend?

[00:36:07] Aren't you getting married soon?

[00:36:10] And then I was like, yeah, I'm why here he goes. What you just got a message from someone that said

[00:36:16] Number one ex-girlfriend and I was like, yeah, that's my number one ex-girlfriend

[00:36:21] So then we had to have like a 20 minute conversation with this guy

[00:36:27] About what happened and actually it wasn't even his fault. So

[00:36:31] It was like a two second conversation

[00:36:34] Where I was just like, no, that's actually her and he's like, okay sounds good

[00:36:38] And then like the three females in the office were

[00:36:42] Coming around the corner going you're talking with your ex-girlfriend. I'm telling you what but I was like, all right

[00:36:48] Look, I was like go for it. You you tell her all you want

[00:36:51] I was like when she's working at the thing that I hear just go tell her tell her in person. That's fine

[00:37:00] So then I was like so then it turned into like that's when it turned into a 20 minute conversation

[00:37:04] Well, I was like look can you just all like

[00:37:06] I'm like, do you see the I was like do you see the picture on the front of the phone? No

[00:37:10] They thought it was funny too. They're just giving me shit

[00:37:13] I was like see the picture on the front of the phone is the same as the picture in the

[00:37:17] Contacts it's the whole

[00:37:20] Jordan likes to change my contact name frequently

[00:37:24] And it's always fun seeing what he puts what you mean. They're always thoughtful and accurate

[00:37:31] Are they not they are exactly you heard it from the number one girlfriend herself

[00:37:37] Oh, sorry number one ex-girlfriend herself

[00:37:40] I'm your number one fiance

[00:37:43] For now

[00:37:45] And then I'll be your number one wife

[00:37:47] Yeah, I think it's wife number one

[00:37:50] You gotta swap around. I know you just like see just get there. That's fine

[00:37:55] The last wife you ever have wow she gone kill me

[00:38:01] I remember

[00:38:04] That you've ever heard that song by a band perry dig two

[00:38:08] Uh, I think so

[00:38:11] Hmm

[00:38:19] Anyway, she says I love I told you on the day we met I was gonna love you till I was dead

[00:38:26] No, I'm I'm really

[00:38:31] Good song we're gonna catch you anyway

[00:38:35] Well, that's all I got. Uh, I know we still gotta go eat so yeah, I'm ready

[00:38:40] Perfect. Well, that's gonna do it for us this week. Ripley's gonna do the outro here

[00:38:43] It goes perfectly flawless the first time. Thank you for listening to mindless prattle

[00:38:48] We hope you like what you heard if you did that's short in i'm ripley

[00:38:53] You can give us a follow here or wherever you listen to your podcast and check out our website at mindless prattle dot com

[00:39:01] Thanks for listening and we will see you next time. Goodbye

[00:39:08] You put the emphasis on the weirdest words

[00:39:10] What do you mean you put it on prattle and then you said yo podcast instead of like your like we didn't want to pronounce

[00:39:15] He ate that but we wanted to

[00:39:18] About the way i'm talking i'm not complaining. I'm just pointing it out

[00:39:21] It makes me feel really self conscious like mindless prattle

[00:39:24] And then like later on you were like wherever yo listen to yo podcast and I was like, oh

[00:39:28] We're switching up

[00:39:32] I know I just it's not a quickness thing. It wasn't a speed issue. All right, that's me in the bedroom. I'm talking about

[00:39:39] Talking about the pronunciation

[00:39:41] I'm sorry pronunciation with prattle yo podcast

[00:39:51] Listen i'm perfect. Hmm not at listening but

[00:39:56] At everything else. No, we gotta go. We're not tolerate lies on this podcast

[00:40:04] Okay, bye

[00:40:08] You